Woah – Its been a while!
I know last I had this marvelous plan to relaunch my blog and make it so fresh and sparkly with all the life-style posts one could want… Yeah *rolls eyes* that definitely did not happen!
Boy do I have a lot to talk about, but I want to keep this post focused! I want to focus on why the last time I posted was a year ago and how I hope *fingers crossed* to change that!
So lets rewinds time and go back to last year… From April on I had a mini self-renaissance. I went Vegan, and started to get more into beauty, skincare, and fashion. I also started losing weight from the new diet and was feeling fantastic. I decided with all this new and awesome self-discovery that I would post about it on my blog and give my blog a complete make over, just like I had done with my lifestyle. Needless to say, that never happened…
…Why? Perfectionist Me.
Its not that I didn’t try. I tried far too much. I ended up taking countless photos for blogs and they were never “good enough” so I just tossed out the idea. I re-skinned my blog many times but kept reverted back because it wasn’t how I wanted. Many iterations of blogs, photos, and themes later, I bared no fruits for my labors. I had wasted days and months.
I was so worried that if what I had made was not “perfect” to me that I would let everyone down and face much judgement. Little did I know, people would more-than-likely not care or love it.
Perfectionism followed me EVERYWHERE
Girl… I wish this was only about my blog and how neglected it has been, but this rabbit hole per usual goes much deeper. Perfectionism was affecting work and my everyday life as well. I was spending much longer doing tasks and accomplishing far less. This started to leave me feeling quite defeated.
One day I happened to watch a video of a girl talking about how perfectionism was challenging her. I thought “what would be bad about perfectionism? It would mean you are hardworking and kick ass!” As I watched I learned that it was quite the opposite and that perfectionism was severely limiting me in every way.
So what are you going to do about it, kid?
Yes, I have identified the biggest problem in my life.. I ought to do something. If I don’t, a year from now I will be in the same place. The first thing I am going to do, is just start getting products out even though they are not “perfect” to me. Like this blog, I wrote it a week ago and wanted to go so much deeper, but realized I just need to get it out! So here it is. The story of my battle with perfectionism, and how I am taking the first step in being “un-perfect”.